A child dreamer and two different kinds of cyborg must cooperate
to free the hostages imprisoned under San Francisco Bay...
PATIENT: I dreamt of a dangerous cat and a mixture of cream and booze called 'appealing nausea'...
THERAPIST: I heard a lecture on feeding alcohol to cats til they choose milk laced with booze...
CAUTION: WILL BOTHER E.S.P. SKEPTICS
A late-night conversation with the proud developer
of a new concept in South Asian convenience dining...
I'm a fox-woman. A human man courts me--insultingly. I dream my brain grows till my head hurts,
till it splits open, till light gets in. I rant at the last dragon. Strange but kindly, he gives me a picnic...
DREAM: Ants invite me to a picnic. But one of the dishes they serve is--other ants!
NEXT DAY: I'm invited to a picnic. And my friend, munching, says...
CAUTION: BUG-EAT-BUG WORLD
I realize the artichoke plate in my lap is a pun: ART! I CHOKE! I need to peel
off my thorny outer leaves of professionalism to find the heart inside...
A lovely pecan pie, but the guests are cutting pieces, dropping them, hands trembling
in growing hunger desperate the dark voracious guests fighting now to freeload...
CAUTION: NOT ABOUT PIE
An experiment to see if pie can substitute for REM seems to work at first, but after the third slice
the subject grows less enthused. By slice six, he dreams he's forcing that pie down the experimenter...
I'm a battered girl who sings in a mall. The Dictator (of all people) helps me start healing and learn to fly...
CAUTION: BATTERING AND ITS CONSEQUENT DAMAGE
I don't know beans about right action, so Kokoro, master chef
of the Bean Bar, teaches me the stages of true mastery...
On my first trip to Europe, I found bees there live in boxes. They came to me in my dream to say "We are slowly
starving, as humans kill the flowers and trees we need." They asked me to warn the white people, who are deaf...
I'm Bill Cosby's wife, finding it hard to cook for him without a stove or fridge...
CAUTION: SLANDER, I HOPED. I HOPED WRONG.
In a world where respectable men wear masks, an old, old man rebels in the crudest way he can...
A visit to a world where they fear blue soup ends in death and resurrection, so I'm pissed at my boss--God.
CAUTION: DEATH, REBIRTH, SACRILEGE... JOB BURNOUT
DREAM: I'm in a restaurant offering just one dish: wild boar, for $12. Excessive. I say no.
NEXT DAY: I tackle a book review I must write. The book costs $12. Excessive. Oh! It's a...
I seek a stolen magic necklace, but end up dating the thief, an elf-queen with STRANGE taste in cookery...
CAUTION: BAD SOUP
The world's first all-bulemic band, Veronica and the Vomits, provokes a riot at our local punk club. So I go to
Anorexic Bootcamp where models learn self-defense under fire, as calories and fat jokes whiz by...
CAUTION: BARF, HORNY ANOREXIC, FOOD FIGHT
I was at a dream conference and brought up a recurrent theme
that others hadn't mentioned: multiple antlerlike branchings...
Stalin's police held my fiancée incommunicado. But I dreamt of her prison, cellmate, and the odd game they played...
Mobilization, war, troop transport, slogans, marching bands and orgies, all in an apotheosis of dough...
CAUTION: ENDS IN SEX
My friend stuffs a broken feeder with birdseed. I worry it'll attract too many wild birds. He laughs "Exactly!"...
I'm bad. I'm really bad. I know I shouldn't have done it. But my mail-order breasts were late...
CAUTION: BREAST THEFT
I'm a middle-aged British writer in a triad with a sculptor and a dairy farmer
who seem happy sharing me. But it's a small town, so we must be discreet...
CAUTION: TRIAD THAT WORKS
Cleo the talking kitten denies being a cat, so I invent Wolf-N-Puma Chow!
Must I play similar games to nourish that other feral critter... me?
I'm lost in the angry streets of Cairo. But I meet a goth-girl with moth-antennae:
a jinni who's working for longterm change. She takes me home...
CAUTION: MOTH NUDITY
The cake horse resented my taking one slice out of him; but he let me.
No second slice, though! He just laughed at me--through his bad teeth...
I'm in a huge colonnade. An army of blood-painted men sacrifice the dove of peace. Their masked leader drinks its blood.
But then I'm carried upstairs to meet... the prophet Daniel! I'm amid the angels, on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel...
CAUTION: BLOOD-DRINKING THUGS
In the woods outside a modern art museum, I'm being stalked by Giacometti's huge skeletal cat...
A lab. The cat doesn't mind a swim in this liquid harmlessly rendering it clear as glass. It catches
a transparent mouse I didn't even see! So now I faintly see a glass mouse inside the glass cat...
DREAM: my parents nag me to go on a picnic, then bring plastic cheese and sprayed, scab grapes. Eat this & I'll get sick...
DAY: a farewell lunch at work. No one likes her, so folks brought only plastic cheese & scab grapes. I eat a bit & get sick...
CAUTION: PSYCHIC DREAM, STUPID DREAMER
I find I'm a self-made... critter. A plushie sewn with zippers so I can stuff any bits of me that
seem flat or limp. But my filling's not cotton, polyester or foam. It's chocolate! So I have...
CAUTION: CRUDE DREAM, AWFUL PUN
In my home town there were tales of coal-eaters. I dreamed of a miner who
transformed the mine-owner into a canary--at a price. He became coal himself...
CAUTION: GRIM MINE, HARSH SACRIFICE
I meet King Louis-Philippe, but as I recall his symbol, the cockerel, he transforms to suit.
Now he cannot read the letter presented to him, so it becomes a basket of bird-seed...
After seeing Christina Applegate in Married with Children, I dream I'm in bed with her. For
contraception, I open a little square packet with... a condom? Or is it a fast-food packet of...
CAUTION: SEXUAL THEME
In endangered woods I meet deer with bold black-and white feather crests.
Higher up, it's barren--a hard winter. But I taste a medicinal blue-black fruit...
A cricket actress I know makes it into the Dynasty of the Gods! Or is it the TV soap "Dynasty"?...
On the Euphrates, a monstrous crocodile eats all his kin. But when a winged ship appears, he feigns remorse...
I infiltrate the Cult of Cake. Novices drool over chocolate frosting
and hand over their life savings. It's a pyramid scheme! A food...
CAUTION: TRUMP REFERENCES; HIDEOUS PUN
I'm trying to prevent a race war, but can I kill someone I admire? And if so, can I live with it?
CAUTION: RACISM, VIOLENCE, INTENSE GUILT
Troutmet the moon-pigeon, Burtra the blackbird, a talking acacia,
my dead father and my dead gardener all give me afterlife-advice...
Delboeuf, ignorant of botany, dreams of feeding lizards a fern called Asplenium ruta muralis;
years later he finds both lizards and fern in books he read and forgot years before the dream...
I'm a reporter. In the mall, I get my pocket picked repeatedly--
but the thieves keep slipping mysterious stuff in, not out...
CAUTION: PUN
Peering in a spacetime gate, I wonder if all the dinos went extinct. Would we spot an ancient Singularity?
A master criminal is tracked down by a hound in a monk's robe
who's introduced to me as... the President of the United States?
CECY: In a desert, a thirsty dog jumps out of a tree--the first known dog suicide...
WAYAN: I'm a talking dog. Our owner denies us enough water, so we protest...
My hunting license won’t let me legally shoot a giraffe or ibex, but I do bag a prime Macy’s salesman...
CAUTION: LICENSE TO KILL
I ride my tricycle all round Sydney trying to get bureaucratic approval
to feed bananas to my friend the grizzly bear, gooey though he gets...
Dinner with Dracula goes well, considering, except for the mayonnaise. But suddenly I'm drowning!
No one sees or hears me. Am I a ghost, am I dead or alive? And how would anyone notice?
A month of dreams full of science fiction: galactic navigation, spacedragons, oppressed fairies, alien love...
The sparrow died in the ashes, but the dove in my hands became a blue cloud.
I drank it, thinking "This will benefit us all"...
Concerned about my health, I up my fiber intake. But not from the usual sources...
CAUTION: BAD DIETARY ROLE MODEL
Lights on the moon! Future cities shine. Gotta fix that time-slip. But in
shaman-space, the moon's a deerskull up a tree! I take it down, pocket its
jewel-city-eyes and try to stew the moon. I'm Coyote, so my cookery goes wrong...
I was floating in the Ether, not far from this world, which seemed small as an apple.
An angel took it in his hand and brought it to me and said, 'This must thou eat'...
The Emperor dreamt he was eating dirt. He feared it was a metaphor for
death. Wrong. No metaphor! Soon after, his enemies suffocated him in dirt...
CAUTION: BRUTAL
In a museum, I absent-mindedly eat crumbly bricks I think are pastry; they really are rare soil-samples...
Three days later, I see a TV show I thought was on children. Wrong; it's on soil samples--that turn into eatables...
I'm a delicate little ermine-chinchilla whose best friends are all sewer rats.
They push their food and drink on me, and I nibble to be polite...
1: I'm starving in a lush valley; a cult claims all the food, the water, even the air.
2: I'm drowning in a cage but find a corner with water I can breathe--just barely.
3: I'm a merman with a wise friend who hints I need to leave those who starve & drown me...
CAUTION: DOMESTIC BATTERING (OFFSTAGE)
Elegant, ancient, the tower rose into the clouds. Inside? Smoke & darkness. Workers roast meat...
A mysterious "Führer" hypnotized all my companions. So I become a human-sized falcon and hunt him...
Coastal unicorns are slender; inlanders bloat. Genes, diet, both? Inland bosses enslave their gracile minority.
Performing pets! Jesters caged, chained & handicapped to heighten the wonder they can do their art at all...
CAUTION: TROUBLING SOCIAL ANALOGIES
A yard sale in a small town turns out to be my family selling porn.
But they want to push more than their sexual values on me...
CAUTION: TWISTED FAMILY, ELEPHANT ABUSE
Famine in the monastery. We add weather charts, leather laces
and walking sticks to the menu. Even the ghosts are hungry...
A bug with a horse-skull face reappears all through this nightmare of betrayal. I only know I feared it...
A free university just opened in town. The curriculum evolves by natural
selection. Anyone can teach! Should I? Just don't eat the food...
That levitating bear's not tightrope-walking--she rides a goat strung like soap-on-a-rope. A goat that's me! I'm eating...
CAUTION: UGH!
I have 'fire in the belly', so I cheer up--if the magazines are right, I'll be President. But it's just bad food...
CAUTION: BELLYACHING
On my 45th birthday, at the end of my eight-year dream-art project, I dream of a women's rite
turning scraps of chewed flesh into a whole fish I offer to the fishbowl in the heart of the Vatican...
The terror of Navy breakfast, the joy of filterfeeding,
how to marry pudding, and a sniper lunch with kisses...
Climbing out of Childhood Abyss, I literally get a leg up from a girl seeking the Ledge of Teens.
A shy girl has to hide she's a were-creature. Gay men make out in the witch-registry to rattle its
homophobic guardians. My sister stripteases while scolding me for a mess I didn't make...
CAUTION: DUH, SEX TABOOS! KIDS, FURS, GAYS, SIBLINGS
I'm a guard on a train crossing the desert who falls in love with a refugee fox-girl,
despite heavy specist peer-pressure and the archaic Railway Code...
CAUTION: NUDE FOX
I felt like my heart was in my stomach. My friend Lyx opened me up & said "It is." She scolded me for eating it...
CAUTION: URP
My horse and I dove into a lagoon and sought buried treasure on the sea-floor. What are we really after?
A woman discovers that her new use for a truck with a telescoping arm has philosophical consequences...
As they lower me into my grave, mourners don't throw dirt but--cottage cheese? I toss it
back, starting a huge foodfight. I climb out to join the fun. Only the poor pastor looks lost...
A human and a talking giraffe fall in love. But some hunters still shoot animal people.
So he camouflages her with paint. Bright paint. Now she's more visible than ever!
Not that I can criticize his eccentricities. I'm in love with a unicorn songwriter...
CAUTION: FURRYPHILIA
At 15 I misheard God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen and liked my version better. "Lit muffin, rude Esmé"...
Green Day singer Billie Joe hocked a lugie on me in concert. I felt blessed...
CAUTION: EWWW
Two sisters want to lick me all over, but they lick everything; weird gut-fauna make them immune to toxins...
Fairy eggs infest my home--become worms, then tiny horses, then mothwinged hobbits, then adult fairies....
CAUTION: NUDE EQUINES & FAE; PARASITES (OR SYMBIOTES?)
A lecturer tries to help the homeless founder of Hamm's Beer, robbed by bankers. But the talk may harm more than help...
I grew extra penises which bud off me like fruit. So I fry them up like sausages, and...
CAUTION: GENITALIA FOR LUNCH
My best friend is a cat. Problem is, I'm a rare hawk--a Cat-Eater. I never, ever would, but...
A revival meeting goes bad--suicides, 'long pig', a hell-pit. If you sup with the devil, carry a long fork!
I'm a hobbit seeking Henry Fonda's haunted gold mine. And find it. Or is that chocolate?
But then I'm caught in a shamanic showdown in a bar where they serve real spirits...
Three friends in one bed dream three dreams in one night about a talking rabbit with a persistent request...
I'm in a restaurant at a round table. Waiters wrap me in hot towels. I laugh "If I were
chilled, I'd love this--but I'm NOT!" I wake to find I am too hot--too many blankets...
I rescue a hummingbird who drinks nectar from my ear. It becomes an Internet star.
But then a girl rides a waterslide with her tits showing, and my meme is over ...
CAUTION: CARTOON BREASTS
I'm at a long table. So many stews, so much rice! Soon we're stuffed. But some people
yell for more! I ask the woman next to me "How could they still be hungry?" She says...
I wake in a hobbit-hole. My love looks worried. What's wrong with me? A badger
takes me to see wizard Sean Connery, who gives me feathers to eat, and I become...
I'm chased by spaghetti, snared, sprinkled with parmesan.
My hungry classmates loom, and my best friend says...
I'm Joe Leaphorn, in (of all places for a Navaho detective) a coven in San Francisco watching a creamy...
A cranky nun wants fish. Ilarya, the monastery's cook, sets out to buy one--a long walk, and unsafe after dark.
So Ilarya asks the sun to halt! She buys her fish, cooks, feeds her patient, and forgets to tell it to set...
CAUTION: PETTY, GOOFY, COMMUNITY-BAFFLING MIRACLE
Fat Max eats with Heinrich the guard on Tuesdays. He talks too much. You and I are hungry. Tonight...
The poem appeared in the dream as it appears on the page--words, even punctuation...
CAUTION: DEATH CAMP, DEATH PLOT
I tour the heart of a red supergiant, where dreaming souls explore
their fears and heart's desires, unconstrained by solid matter...
CAUTION: SWEDENBORGIAN VISION, UNICORN NUDITY
Mistress Abbot dreams if she eats a jackfish her child will be great. Next morning one swims into her waterbucket...
A library shows me surrealist Jean Arp's sketchbook. One Eschery sketch with repeated focal points is hypnotic.
But they also show me his lunch, and I try to eat it! I fail. Head & gut disagree. Stuck Arp-way...
CAUTION: NEVER EAT 12-YEAR-OLD SUSHI
Joseph as a teen dreams sheaves of his brothers' grain bow to his; then the sun, moon & stars bow to him.
Eleven years later, in prison, Joseph interprets two cellmates' dreams as premonitory, and gets both right.
Two years later, he interprets two bizarre dreams troubling the Pharaoh, thus saving Egypt from famine...
CAUTION: BRONZE AGE FUN! NEAR-FRATRICIDE, SLAVERY, EXECUTION, FORCED MARRIAGE...
A pig-man hybrid--huge mouth, tiny body--happily eats trash, smirking as I pass...
Then a woman bends over to flash me, smirking, as a censorious Judge glares...
CAUTION: SCENE 1 GROSS, SCENE 2 SEXUAL
A bewildering dream of a boy's borrowed bath, absconding renters' furniture and fly-eating turns real a few weeks later...
I'm in the kitchen making a mess--kneading pasta dough on the bookcase. If my mom comes in and sees...
Pretty much everyone in my school is a bloodsucking alien, but, come to think of it, so what?
CAUTION: SEX, VAMPIRES, SEX WITH VAMPIRES, BUT NICE VAMPIRES
Leather boys flap down from the sky, feeding from giant mustard pots. We fight them with honey & boomerangs.
I wake up as someone else. I go through her working day, till Captain Kirk comes to take me to...
Out of a Campbell's soup can poured life force: someone's last breath...
I've got too many obligations, an elderly relative to care for, and now giant birds are invading my house.
CAUTION: STALKING, KILLER BIRDS
I'm in what seems to be a village of very conservative Muslims. But they're really alien castaways...
Our cowboy posse tracks a fugitive to a strange amethyst mine, where we're offered peculiar jobs...
I'm in the cellar, petting a tiger-cat. She speaks inside my head: "I'm tired of living on bread. I need meat."
I make excuses--it's pricy--then see big hanging quarters of meat. I hide them! She says "Call me Mistress
Touttmouss"--well, something like that--I know it's English, but can't make it out til I wake, when I see...
She turned me to a pig. I rooted hungrily, not for food but for moly, the sacred herb that could undo her spell...
CAUTION: TRAPPED IN PORCINITY
How'd that spider, dragon and T. rex get in my soup? I skip lunch.
Dig in the garden, but scaly heads pop out to nip at me. Persistent!
Dinner with the Lightbulb Heads. When we leave, the Mood Elevators welcome us...
but won't let us out! And in the struggle to escape, heads will roll--and shatter...
CAUTION: HARSH WORDS ON WESTERN MEDICINE
A new Eve asks the Time Commission to send her and her baby back to Ethiopia
45,000 years ago. But they're shy Moomintrolls, not humans...
A cannibal friend of mine is shocked at our burial customs, and argues his case in court using crabs...
I work in a witness protection program. We hide the Muppet on the bottom
of an empty swimming pool, hand him a long straw, and fill it with...
I'm hiking through the Catskills when a gigantic amoeba comes slipping over the hills...
After eating iffy food, I had gut pains all night--but I dreamed of rebels with swords
fighting a fascist empire. Were my dreams siding with the food? Well, no...
I love a cute vampire. She's willing to go on a diet. Even so, do I have enough blood to spare?
I commute to my dreamjob on a four-story bus; then my baby brother
(who I wouldn't let eat any chocolate pudding) utters a new poem by William Blake...
My friend Carol and I are carrots. We crawl out of our vegetable bed
through the kitchen window, and end up happily hot-tubbing in soup...
At a party, Nietzsche told a young woman "my hand was transparent as glass;
and a fat toad sat on my hand. I felt compelled to swallow it, and did..."
CAUTION: CREEPY DREAM, CREEPY FOLLOW-UP
(plus a 2018/8/31 dream by Wayan provoked by Panter's dream art)
Rather than a dream narrative, this is a tour through Gary's common dreamscapes--
forgotten places, empty streets. Or ones you wish were empty...
I'm in a basement, forced to enact a ritual where I must mate with, then FEED on, a flayed creature...
I wake shaken, open a random book--and it describes the ancient Celtic rites of Epona...
CAUTION: BESTIALITY, MATE-DEVOURING
Down at the tideline, a man dressed in seaweed disproves John Donne's adage...
Mom gave me cookies for my three-year solo spaceflight. Special cookies for both ends of me...
CAUTION: NUDITY, BAD SEX ADVICE
After reading a manga and gorging on sushi, I dream a mob of little ninjas
dressed as catgirls pile on me, begging to be petted. Excitement, guilt...
CAUTION: PEDOPHILIA, NON-FREUDIAN INTERPRETATION
Touring an underground maze, I meet a woman I like. But her brother bristles.
Then, from a height, I see the ventilation pits of the labyrinth laid out like a map.
The Japanese invade! Hide in the jungle. Women in rags butcher centipedes & mice...
CAUTION: UNHAPPY MEALS; OVER-JUNGIANISM
An alien beach scene--as seen through eyes that see bodies’ energy fields more than surface forms...
In her kitchen she offers me shortcake. She's short herself, for she gives away all
to everyone--only her bodiless head is left...
My love and I steal the only onion in the world! To make our getaway we sail off the edge of the earth...
A coy, giggling giant orange bounces onto a man's bed, trying to seduce him, and...
An alien woman makes a mess of our economy, ecology, world--but insists she wants to be my friend...
My parents, alive again, steal my car, my meds & my supplements,
trapping me in their isolated house and forcing me to stay awake--
no sleep, no food. They're out to cure my silly, selfish idea I have needs...
Patches the kitten, my alter ego, paws at flying fish who are also toast-slices...
At a party I meet a friend I thought was dead. She’s become a small talking rabbit made of cake, and I...
CAUTION: UGH
Bums tap on the diner window. I tell them to buzz off, until I really look at
the latest--a shaman dressed as a huge pigeon. He's no panhandler!...
I'm shown corn plants growing from skulls, and it seems like I must plant some skull-corn myself...
I'm in a play. Fear, then joyful sex, then ranching, then silly hats, as a man drones on about
class struggle. Weird chairs, pingpong, coffee, impossible double utterances. At last
I tell friends my dream--backwards. Then I write the dream down on slices of cheese...
CAUTION: SEX ONSTAGE
I dream of a half-pony half-human girl who can't eat either hamburgers or hay. She figures out an appropriate diet...
I botched President Clinton's taco. And on the way home, I fell in the river.
Luckily, Jesse Jackson happened by and pulled me out, restoring my faith in...
In the Cave of the Ant Ambassador, I meet his mate, a beautiful translucent fox named
Raethe. Way happier with her mate (& body!) than in that dream just two months ago...
I was just a street rat, but I danced with the princess at a ball, and fell in love. Three rich suitors pulled their blades...
I'm a rebel leader released from prison only to find my people beaten down
and malnourished. I swear to eject our oppressors despite the price of war. ...
I'm sitting in a car teetering in the front row of a theater balcony. By me, R. is licking a cherry-
flavored sucker. As the film crew yells "Roll it!" my foot slips on the brake and I do...
The posse lost their enemy; reluctantly they asked a tracking detective--me.
They found him where I knew he'd be--from eating my Rolodex cards...
I was a robot who had a soul--till the Reagans stole it! I track them down, and
demand it back. Simply confronting them works--the hole inside me is filled...
CAUTION: CAUSTIC POLITICS
In the woods I catch a beautiful rooster. It doesn't struggle; it turns into a dog.
We make friends. We sleep together in the wood; I dream we grow old together.
The dog's owner wakes me; farewell, dog! But at least the funeral has caviar...
I'm dating a sexy salad. But I just gobble the good bits and leave: I have an appointment in Chinatown.
The salad understandably feels let down, but she's painfully familiar with guys who eat and run...
CAUTION: WEIRD EVEN BY MY STANDARDS
I find myself sitting on toy trains and fake snow as I'm told a fable:
how a herd of department-store Santas got tragically lost in a blizzard...
CHRIS: I find what may be a magic potion, if it has a scroll hidden in the liquid...
MARK: I'm underwater. Spirits dance around me, on top of sunken scrolls...
Aliens, hypnotherapy, dancing molars, riots, witches, flying pianos, lettuce... yet there is a point.
A doctor tells Ellis to try "selvdrolla", but he's so focused on the strange name he forgets the prescription...
One night as I slept over a cheese shop, I dreamt I was trapped in a huge cheese, as a rat-horde gnawed...
CAUTION: YOU ARE LUNCH
My work as a federal shaman inspector involves judging a rainbow of traditions by a few basic principles:
Compulsively honest spirit-women with waterjugs invade my friend's house.
I wake to find my girlfriend's obsessing on hair loss. To calm her, I babble about limb loss...
and wake again to find she was a dream too.
My friend sleeps with an alien. He's ugly, but I don't care. What bothers me is, he eats bits of himself...
CAUTION: SEX, RECREATIONAL CANNIBALISM, PROSTITUTION, THE KITCHEN SINK
A thousand feet above New York. I meet two naked angels who say it's their first flight, but I
got no fear of falling anymore; got no body to fall. Sit on a cloud. Just me and my shadow...
1: A flooded bathroom becomes 2: a glass water-piano; 3: my friend strips in a restaurant, so
4: they serve me gutted dog. 5: Dolls teach prostitution, as 6: a rhino rubs up to an elephant-bear...
Infected glass-cuts scar the vegan alligators in the park. As part of a cleanup, I'm told to EAT one...
Things start materializing in my house: first three tiny naked scientists, then a huge impossible fruit...
CAUTION: NUDE SCIENTISTS
Lost in the snow, I must give my baby to a stranger or let my dad put him in a box, safe, forever...
The lights go out, the world's ending. Roz tries to make party snacks and keep folks calm. At last
she notices lights out the window. Other buildings seem fine. Is it really the Apocalypse? Or...
I discover a Sorting Hat, as in Harry Potter--and it moves in with us. Our cat crawls in and plays peekaboo.
She becomes a teenager eager to get drunk at Thanksgiving--like every adult in her life. But she's not
puking drunk like them, so she must be OK! Just as I think I am--I only overwork to exhaustion.
CAUTION: DRUNK TEEN CAT, SEVERELY ALCOHOLIC ADULTS
My family moves into a damp, leaking basement. My dad just sneers at us for fussing
about the cold, the damp, the mildew, the leaks. "I'll show you REAL leaking..."
I'm a Lapp boy in northern Finland, studying shamanism. So why do I pour coffee down a driveway?
I want to drink the elixir, but negative 20 spoons block me! Can I remove them? With warped teacup logic & reciprocals…
I'm in a department store trying on clothes when I notice there's a large zucchini growing from my crotch...
CAUTION: SQUASHY PENIS, ICKY RECIPE
On a poster of a model who's around my weight, someone's scrawled STARVATION IMAGERY...
CAUTION: DEFENSE OF SKINNY PEOPLE
DREAM: a weird footbridge of twisting tree-branches; with steps made of wood-cased stereo equipment!
NEXT EVE: a birthday potluck with a twisting papier-maché trees. Steps lead up to a treehouse full of...
I meet a woman on an oxcart who's sure we all want to poison her--
but in a way her affliction's made her forgiving, even noble...
CAUTION: MADNESS
Nerds built the blues. Rick Moranis, famous blues-nerd, makes a groupie suck his ice cream cone...
CAUTION: MOCKS MUSIC, RACE, VANILLA ICE (CREAM)...
I was anorexic for years before I found I was allergic to many foods--I had good reason not to eat!...
To avoid being stabbed, I flee the Psychodrama Circus. Wisely--the place explodes!
But it's the filling of the sushi roll that really upsets me...
CAUTION: CANNIBAL MAKI
An ancient pictograph inspires me to try a meditative technique: shrinking and letting myself be eaten...
CAUTION: DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME
I was late for something, so I opened my pocket watch and swallowed a bunch of numbers...
A lonely little girl plays on a swing in her yard. A shy young faun or satyr
who has a crush on her conjures up a strange gift: a translucent wall of candy...
You get to fill one tray. Guns sex jewels pot hamburgers TV God power thrills love? Choose!
My friend Tanya tries hard to save her marriage, but in her dreams Isidora Duncan,
Carl Jung, even the gods themselves warn her to face their deep incompatibility...
An alien tiger and his human girlfriend herd me to their house
and show me a cube of raw flesh... but why?
When I overwork, neglecting my body's wants, I dream of an angry tiger. Over
time, I've learned (mostly) to feed my tiger, and sometimes he's an ally now...
I'm a tiger from Planet Cat, visiting Earth to run in San Francisco's "Bay to Breakers" race.
I knew racial tensions were high, but why is William S. Burroughs out to kill me? Oh. Because...
I'm mortal, yet I'm offered a residency in the Commune of the Gods,
along with Xena the Amazon Warrior and... Little Red Riding Hood?
Four lines of comic nonsense composed in a dream...
How the world was really created. God said "Let it be well done" and it was well done.
CAUTION: TECHNOLOGICAL BLASPHEMY
Why's Mexico City built where it is? And why is corn called "ears"? It turns out these questions are linked...
Climbing a mountain on Mars, I reach a hall where I'm transformed into a cryophilic being.
Then I feast on methane soup with the heroic Martian dead...
Silicon Valley goes enthusiastically fascist. I hide in a berry patch. They build a shining world, and then...
Arboreal marsupials with megaphones narrate a Polynesian documentary, while
the rare translucent lobster sings its death song, sacrificing itself for lunch
CAUTION: WILL CAUSE VEGETARIANISM
I get painful menstrual cramps, and with them come nightmares of birth. Not always child birth;
once it was five kittens. Most recently the baby was human but encased in a Butterball turkey...
DREAM: I'm a Soviet Potato Fest. Reds, grannies, food. A girl's told a life-and-death lie about a canine...
NEXT DAY: I read a version of Red Riding Hood, and the dream's weird elements suddenly make sense.
CAUTION: SOVIET CLICHÉS, E.S.P. SPECULATION
Swedenborg flies on horseback through a house seeking someone. One room's clean, lit, full of people, but
most are empty and dirty. Longing to meet God is not enough! He's only cleaned up one aspect of his life...
An improvised painting-series exploring my obsession for Utopia--and your deafening silence...
CAUTION: IDEAS, FURRY NUDITY, THAT GOSH-DARN MODERN ABSTRACT ART
After a visit from our landlady's angry, crazy son
I dream hungry velociraptors invade our house...
I'm a flying fox in England. I see a poisoning and call for help. Ugly knockoffs of
Peanuts characters attack me! The real Peanuts gang defeats them; Snoopy drives
the victim to the hospital, saving her. It really is vital to be... authentic.
CAUTION: PUNS
Junk in the attic? Treasures! The cat musicians shift from cartoons to life as I ascend,
til in the ultimate attic--the astral beach--I meet a cattaur made of pure (de)light...
CAUTION: SEX-CRAZED CATS, NEW AGE FINALE
The vulture people are fucking in the city dump. I end up their guest, given putrid food
in their cold stinking house of rancid grease. I'll become a vulture too...
CAUTION: UGH!
After fasting for six days, I dreamed of three spirit helpers who aided my village,
guiding hunters toward game and healing others. But I lost so many loved ones...
CAUTION: SPOUSE MURDERED; CAREER BURNOUT
I'm the new manager of the watermelon mine. And to free the trapped minors--
oops, miners!--I have to plan. So I cover the floor with My Little Pony post-its...
CAUTION: CARTOON NUDITY
I help a brilliant, starving composer turn his family curse into a profitable business...
I'm nine years old again. But my mom acts like a child--crawls into a hole. I follow, scared,
and find my grandfather packing to leave the Old Country before the Nazis kill us all...
CAUTION: FEAR & PERSECUTION
by Wayan; 2013/4/13, an epic shamanic epiphany dream with tinges of ESP
I meet my Creator--a were-deer. No wonder I'm a shy, horny herbivore
so unlike these naked apes! She tells me my divine purpose...
CAUTION: MONOTHEISTIC BLASPHEMY; E.S.P. FLASH; NUDE DEER
An invisible monster is eating my lettuce patch.
It casts a huge blurry shadow, leaves footprints, but...
Dry noodles shatter when bent. Wait, not noodles--they have auras! Feel like me--parts of me? Oh!
These aren't noodles or strands of my being. I'm not this brittle. They're relatives!
I'm lucid but paralyzed. A weird child spies on me; is she controlling me?
Then I'm having sex--but if I come, I'll wake up! Then some thugs jump me.
I make sure they won't bother me again, but... is everyone in this dream out to distract me?
CAUTION: SEX, MUGGER-STOMPING
I have a long chat with two songbirds. Next I'm a parrot, living in rainforest. Then the mail comes...
Six generations in the future, I find a poodle who can defuse the bomb my snotty friends can't...
CAUTION: MAD SCIENTIST, EXHIBITIONIST GIRLFRIEND, POODLE MOCKERY
My job's to feed the wolves downtown with the heads of tuna-human hybrids; I mystify the pack
with a blend of skating, ballet and rope tricks. Wait, could this work on scary humans, too?
A dream telling how to acquire mystic power: raw food, no sex, meat, or booze; just meditate in rural solitude...
CAUTION: EXTREMISM
DAY: a toxic potluck. Not the first! But this time I say no...
DREAM: I'm a scent-oriented alien, tossing stinkbombs back...