THAT EVENING

I see a TV interview of a comedian (sorry, didn't get her name). She says "I made fun of my small breasts for years. Then I got breast cancer. Double mastectomy. I got back on stage... and found myself wondering aloud if my breasts walked out on me after all those years of putdowns. Did they leave me to show me what boobless really means?"

THAT NIGHT

I'm a living stuffed toy--a horse plushie. I sewed the shape of my own fake fur and filled myself with batting. But my skin's limp in spots, where my body has too little filling. So I need to slip in extra filler. Prepare to open seams in my sewn skin...

No, wait, I installed small zippers here and there! Foresight! So much easier than ripping seams and resewing.

Why add more filler? Why not trim & tighten my skin to fit the fill? But I never think of that!

Weirder yet, the material I fill myself in with isn't cotton or polyester or foam rubber, but black chocolate. Pure, sugarless, bitter cacao. Pad my skinny biceps, pad my skinny butt...

The very last pad-up is the most disturbing: to fill & smooth that loose wrinkled skin, I slip at least an ounce of chocolate into each of my testicles! I admit chocolate's famous as a love drug...

But these chocolate balls are going too far.

NEXT MORNING

Why'd my dream invert that TV interview on mastectomy, adding flesh instead of subtracting? Well...

Like many under quarantine during the Covid pandemic, I gained weight. And part of that weight-gain was from sugarless chocolate, a mood drug I craved--its theobromine made me feel loved and sexy, despite isolation. That biochemical lie warded off depression!

Safer than booze or drugs, for sure. But it was fattening.

I knew that intellectually, but I still couldn't quit. Addicted! Months after restrictions eased in my town, I still struggle to cut back. So this dream made me feel my fattening directly--chocolate instantly padding sex--and flesh! With that awful pun for dessert.

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