I've had this dream three times now.

I am sitting on my couch at home with a close friend of mine (we will call him Connor) and we are watching television. Connor in real life has been my friend for years but we recently have become closer, I am not attracted to him sexually in any way and he has never even had his first kiss nor been with a woman. So in the dream I turn to him and we talk about various abstract things that don't seem to make any sense from what I can remember the conversation went like this:

Me: "Connor, you are very kind."

Connor: "Walls are kind because they give us shelter."

Me: "Is shelter all humans need, or is stability not important?"

Connor: "I am not fond of anyone."

That is all I can specifically remember about the conversation. Next thing I remember we were kissing and grabbing one another. I asked him if he had ever kissed someone before and he said no so I continued to kiss him. We had sex on the coffee table and afterwards we sat back on the couch with him still exposed. He had a strange cut at the side of his penis that oozed a white goo and he explained that it was a common disorder that many men had because of bad circumcisions. In the dream I didn't really care but after waking up the image won't go away and it's quite repulsive.

I remember knowing I was dreaming at that point by ensuring that Connor didn't have the right colored eyes (in the dream they were brown, in real life they are blue), I had done the same thing last time I dreamt about having sex with him because I regret it immediately every time.

INTERPRETATION?

I don't know why I keep dreaming this. I dreamt this a few months ago, near Christmas 2015, then about two weeks ago, then last night. My boyfriend and I broke up last Saturday after having a fight that started because I was hanging out with Connor, but the relationship was never very good in the first place and the breakup was inevitable. Connor and I have been talking more since my boyfriend and I broke up, but not in any romantic or flirtatious way, we are just good friends and I don't want anything more.

It is so strange to me to have these sexual dreams because I have had very very few before and they were typically with the person I was dating at the time as opposed to a random friend. The other two times I dreamt about sleeping with him I hid it, because that meant I was cheating on my boyfriend at the time, but this time I wasn't concerned (because I am now single) but I still told him not to tell anybody.

I interpreted this dream as perhaps some sort of sign that Connor is a good friend and maybe I should be looking at him more seriously as a romantic partner. But the weird penis thing just freaks me out and I have no idea what it means. Perhaps that since he is a virgin that having sex with him may be undesirable, I mean, I would feel odd having sex with someone who has never before.

--R. Moreau

EDITOR'S NOTE

What jumps out for me isn't his weird dick but that weird dialog. It sounds pretty surreal, but the bit you remembered has some clear warnings. You say he's kind, he answers even walls are kind. Is he saying he's passive & unfeeling like a wall? And his last line, "I am not fond of anyone"... ouch.

If it were my dream I'd guess it was warning "A relationship with him may be pretty limited because he's sexually wounded, probably from long ago" (that bad circumcision). You could be right that the dream's saying only that it might be weird with a sexually inexperienced guy, but that image of it being from circumcision suggests to me something more, like childhood abuse or harsh religious brainwashing about sex, something like that. Of course those are MY associations to the image of botched circumcision and an unhealed wound.

To me the dream seems neither warning nor encouraging. More... skeptical? I'd read it as "Go ahead and try, it may not be disastrous, but don't get your hopes up--he's wounded and hasn't dealt with it yet."

--Chris Wayan

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