Silky, my familiar, in a sexy human body today, is playing with me: we're scribbling with emotional crayons. If you see blue, you feel blue, and so on.

It's fun to learn which colors/emotions are opposites. A revelation to her, how some fit neatly into complementary pairs. Oh, we all know it intellectually, but it's different coloring a patch in and then feeling the emotion. Being pulled this way and that.

I also like those emotions that "trine" on the color wheel: not opposites, but far apart, mixable to create whole ranges of blends, like blue and yellow making a chorus of greens.

Silky says in delight "First I undervalued feelings, then I was afraid of them... but I hadn't realized how colorful they are!"

I still fear getting trapped in one mood, one color range--it's happened to me for long periods after all. But now I have a full emotional palette, and can draw a feeling's opposite to pull myself out of anything bad.

I don't think I even HAD a full set before! All those drab years--ill, fragile--it wasn't safe to let myself feel too strongly! I'd get sick. Body just couldn't take it.

Limited my palette.

NOTE ON THE PAINTING

Since, awake, I only have acrylic paint, not dream-crayons that stimulate specific emotions automatically, I decided to list the links on the painting. Those squiggles are my private dream-glyphs, and they label each hue with its emotion (at least according to the dream scheme): grief (indigo blue), fear (purple), love (plum-red), rage (red-orange), shame (gold), joy (lemon yellow), jealousy (green), serenity (turquoise)...

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