I'm a hobbit in Silicon Valley, stalking Ring-wraiths down El Camino. But one of them's stalking me...
CAUTION: VIOLENCE, HYPNOTIC GASLIGHTING
We desert-hobbits break through to a world of jungle giants who
see differently from us. Will they believe us about the UFOs?
1: I visit Elrond and Bilbo in Elvenhome, but overthinking traps me in a timeloop;
2: Elrond says he renounces seriousness for joy, and plans a great, inclusive party;
3: I feel unworthy, but set out on a desert quest with Elrond's young apprentice;
4: I meet joyful, drunken, singing elves but hide in a tree, too shy to join in;
5: I meet a nervous elven singer and a dolphin trapped in a tiny pool in my bedroom...
I'm a hobbit seeking Henry Fonda's haunted gold mine. And find it. Or is that chocolate?
But then I'm caught in a shamanic showdown in a bar where they serve real spirits...
I contemplate Bilbo taunting Smaug, then Frodo, Sam and Gollum triggering Mt Doom to erupt,
but next I "remember" other fiery catastrophes and "realize" hobbits are always causing...
I'm a hobbit woman in Los Angeles, hiding a magic weapon
from Sauron. No, not THAT weapon. The wishing-bucket...
I'm a sniper in a desert battle of men against hobbits. Guilty for not fighting openly, but that'd be suicidal...
CAUTION: MATH AND WAR
I wake in a hobbit-hole. My love looks worried. What's wrong with me? A badger
takes me to see wizard Sean Connery, who gives me feathers to eat, and I become...
An assassination plot using two planes triggers an invasion of our kingdom. Flee? Fight?
I'm a peaceful hobbit who'd rather be playing Frisbee with the dryads...
I'm in Middle Earth, interviewing dwarves and hobbits
who've experienced a phenomenon called Summoning...
I'm on a world inhabited by hobbits when H.G. Wells shows up, looking for a Ring of Power...